PAIN THAT IS GAIN !!!!

                                      

"I haven't got time for the pain-
I haven't got room for the pain-
I haven't the need for the pain"

Carly Simon 

How can I turn off this PAIN I feel ?, I know it is easy for me to believe that "this pain will pass"; because this is what my Faith leads me to believe. An unshaken belief in A God whose name is JEHOVAH. 

But I find out that it is necessary I embrace this pain brought on by Sunday's Dana plane crash in the hope that perhaps in opening up myself to it and paying so much attention to it, I would finally understand that " though Pain is ineveitable, but my decision to remain in the situation that brings on so much suffering is optional ".

The recent events of death and carnage especially with the Dana Air Crash on Sunday just brought everything to a head for me. One minute we were rounding up prayers for a fellow ToTian's father after an exciting hot seat session with Nelson Jaja (DG Timariv), when in walks Eugene interjecting with the words that changed me forever; "and while we are at it, pls lets observe a minute silence for the lives that have just been lost in a Dana Air Crash" I felt my heart stop and not without good reason; because later I found out just how 'affected' I was by the tragedy. From Childhood friends to my sibling's colleague (they had worked together till the wee hours of sunday morning); to sis-in-law's director with his whole household; to friends siblings. Oh God, here I was in Port Harcourt and I felt this heat; supposing, just supposing it was a PH bound flight and then I cried.

I cried for my country; I was outraged by the Broadcast that started making the rounds by the next day supposedly from someone who had first hand encounter with the incompetence of Dana and kept it to himself;  I listened to a Dana staff speak on monday morning on Channels TV (incognito of course) of how the plane was not fit for service but some bureaucratic mumbo jumbo had insisted against wise counsel that they fly. Wasn't these all medicine after death? I cried and sought answers. Thankfully Ola Sarunmi"s Broadcast yesterday put things in perspective for me..According to him, We adorn our Victim mentality albeit stoically and have resigned ourselves to accepting mediocrity for fear of demanding our due.; we have become immune to others pain so long as its not our lot; we have become a "Thank God its not me generation; with our empathy displayed in mundane (dpish) ways and long after families affected still mourn their loss, we move on to more interesting pursuits. We forget that the rain does not choose on whom to fall. The Book of Lamentations tells me that it is just by God's Grace that we are not consumed. And I cried some more.

In the midst of ensuing chaos on social media following the plane crash, I deliberately chose not to make any comments that would be misconstrued; not out of fear or a lack of what to say, but simply because of the PAIN. 

I thought the decision to withdraw Dana's permit would ease the pain? But it didnt; I watched their Director of Operations speak this morning on STV and  listening to him insinuate the likely hood of "birds in engine" being responsible for the crash brought on A RAW PAIN THAT CAN ONLY BE ASSUAGED BY ACTION THAT WILL LEAD TO CHANGE. 

ACTION Yes! because his words were a travesty to the memories of the 153. A travesty because all I sensed as he spoke was that his words were a prelude to a major cover up. AND I REALISED WITHOUT THE BENEFIT OF ANY HARD FACTS THAT IF SOMETHING IS NOT DONE, DANA AIR MANAGEMENT WILL WALK FREE ...This is not  a terrorist attack; this is not a boko haram bomb incident of yet to be identified perpetrators, This evil was done by men with faces.. who sadly seem set to cash in on the weaknesses of those that should throw the rule book at them.

MY PAIN IS GOOD. YES IT IS GOOD BECAUSE IT MAKES ME FEEL BAD ENOUGH TO WANT TO SEE THINGS DONE DIFFERENTLY.

AND BY JOVE I BELIEVE THIS TIME AROUND. THEY WOULD BE DONE DIFFERENTLY, STARTING WITH MAKING AN EXAMPLE OF ALL THOSE THAT ARE CULPABLE IN THIS DISAsTER.

In the last one year we have lost so many lives in senseless events that have left the majority bereft because of the inability to bring anyone to book. Lives that have been lost at a time when we are not at war. Not so this time, that the 153 would not have died in vain.

I am sure this PAIN is not mine alone to feel..I just PRAY THAT MY PAIN (and that of many others) WILL BE OUR GAIN WHEN CHANGE COMES.
IF AFTER ALL OF THESE, WE SAY NOTHING AND DO NOTHING, THEN WE ARE ALL RESPONSIBLE.

Stay Rooted

OSA